2013 is the year.

So much that it's already three and a half months in. It's nuts.


Following my adventure with signing up with ADA Management, getting my shit together online, and reporting about the wonderful world of the Viscera Organization, 2012 was wrapped up with a perfect red bow by submitting an application for the Directing for Women Workshop at the American Film Institute on New Years Eve, coupled with a small fire, a dog (Lulu), and some friendly neighborhood fireworks in New Mexico. Since then, I've crossed the country into international territory and back again, worked on a brilliant film with beautiful people, navigated subways, met several people I should have met long ago, and started business relationships that just might leave a mark long after I exist.

One can only hope, right?

I ended 2012 in a frenzy. I was robbed. My car died in a desert flood. I was told my dog has cancer. I was kicked in the face (symbolically) yet had so many wonderful people on my side to lean on. I got up, brushed the dirt off, and went to the border to buy a car. I found her (penned "Abigail") with the very first dealership I approached, but tested the waters for several days until I was satisfied. I negotiated everything and dealt with a constant onslaught of used car dealers who hated their lives, or hated me, or sloppily tried to make a move, or just wanted to make a fucking sale and forget about it all when they went home at night. It took me a few very trying days and I even had to flee a dealership when the manager recognized me from a film I starred in, which created an onslaught of dealers looking at me, whispering, and pointing. I left, clumsily dropping shit on the way out, all the way through the parking lot. It reminded me of when people generally get mesmerized when they see an accident: they just stare and point. I drove away as quickly as I could.

Gila Hot Springs-I cannot wait to get back this place.

Shortly after, I headed up to a metal show in Albuquerque, NM and saw a really good Portland-based band called Atriarch and followed up with a lovely visit to the Gila Hot Springs. It was beautiful and soooooo cold. Swinging through Silver City, NM, I spent a couple extra days with friends before heading to San Diego in early December, hauling a trailer with my new ride and wonderful company. The next night I landed back in LA and started the process of cleaning my place, which was trashed from the robbery. Three days later, the cleaning and dog-proofing was done.

In the span of less than 2 weeks I ran to meetings. I took up boxing again. I worked with Jim Kunz on editing my actors reel (to be released shortly!).  I caught up on work and meetings, attending the End of the World Fundraiser at Jumpcut Cafe for the Etheria Film Festival. Hit the dollar sale with Lia Scott Price. Ted McCarthy and I even had a double feature night of A Serbian Film and Human Centipede 2.

Lia Scott Price and I at the End of the World fundraiser! Miss you girl!

On Christmas Day, I packed Abigail and Lulu and headed from LA to San Diego to spend the evening with family and hung out with Miguel Rodriguez, wherein we had lunch and watched "Django: Unchained", which was freakin' awesome! Really well done. I left the next morning, headed for New Mexico, crashing at Chelsea Clark's (a fellow post-Alamogordian) place on the border and landed in Carlsbad the next day.

On the road with Lulu, riding a giant lizard.

After bringing in the New Year, I traveled to a flight in El Paso, headed for Montreal, Quebec. However the flight was canceled due to sudden snow on the border, so I caught another. We loaded on the plane, then we had to de-plane, then re-board. What was going to be a 15-16 hour travel day turned into 30 hours of wandering through airports, sleeping on dirty floors, going through customs, and having 4 flights all over the country. I came off the plane in Montreal looking and feeling like a crazy person, into the arms of filmmaker Maude Michaud. After some fantastic coffee, sushi, raw food, and rehearsals, we commenced with shooting DYS-, Maude's debut feature film.

Photo and manipulation by Irene Langholm.

With Alex Goldrich, a fantastic Montreal-based actor.

I played Eva, an ex-model who is in a tumultuous relationship with her husband, Sam. We shot in a beautiful condo on the edge of the historical district. It was an emotional rollercoaster and we had the best catering I've ever experienced on set, provided by Maude's lovely parents. The FX artist, Sebastian Monpetit, even brought gluten free cupcakes (YES!) from a local bakery and friend one day. Seeing Maude so ecstatic in her creative process was uplifting and fueled me even more so. The cast and crew were all so amazing, and so nice. I freakin' love Canadians. We had the most awesome pre-wrap party ever, with a drink at Fouf's, ("electric butt" or "pussy", depending on where you are from), all-you-can-eat sushi, and a 3 hour dance party at a bar called Baracca, which had no dance floor. It was an honor to be apart of this production.

The ones on the right are gluten free! Thank you Seb!

Izzy and I at the Green Dragon Tavern.

Bidding everyone goodbye, I jumped on a greyhound and headed to Boston, hailed a cab, and crashed at Michele Izzy Galgana's pad (and her husband Steve!). We had a blast, watching movies like "The Sentinel", meeting up with Chris Hallock to watch "Rosemary's Baby" on the big screen, and visiting the Somerville Theatre (home of the Etheria Film Festival). We had dinner at the historical Green Dragon Tavern with Mike Snoonian and he filled me up with even more gluten free cupcakes, hot toddy's, and guacamole. I even got to visit with some family before jumping on another greyhound to NYC. Perfecto!

I arrived at the bus station in Manhattan and promptly saw a fire, paid a homeless man to take me to the right terminal, was followed by a bunch of creepy men, and had the worst tasting coffee I've ever had in my life (and I've had a lot of coffee in my day). I made friends with the greyhound attendees and they helped me get on the right bus and gave me directions to the subway in Brooklyn.  I hauled my shit through Brooklyn to Ben and Jane Rose's place, who kindly let me stay with them and pet their kitties. I ran all over Brooklyn and did meetings with fashion designer Cadi Storm, starting out with photographer Diane Suarez to do a photo shoot at a funky tequileria in east Manhattan. I discovered the beauty of hop stop (thank you, Ben!) and crashed on Olivia Saperstein's couch (dude, you rock). I played with 2 black kitties and toured coffee shops to catch up on work in between meetings. It was insanity.

WIth Cadi Storm before I got completely tanked.

Lake Mead, right next to the casino I stayed at.

As I made my way back to LA, I did a pitstop in Texas. I grabbed Lulu and said goodbye to my Mother in New Mexico, who is going on a HUGE trip on a bicycle (not a motorcycle) around America. She amazing, and slightly insane.  It's been a huge dream of hers since she was a pre-teen, and now she's doing it. Awesome.

Lee and I on stage at the Dam Short Film Festival. Thank you Lee Lanier and John LaBonney for including horror films by women in the lineup!

In mid February, I finally made it back to mi casa in LA and within 24 hours filmmaker Lori Bowen flew in for pre-production on I AM MONSTER, a short film I co-directed with her as part of a series titled "FLESH: tales of sexual horror".  Lori and I drove all over LA, putting over 1000 miles on my car and dealt with costume emergencies, location issues, and made sure to get all the right elements into place. IAM turned out a-mazing. We had a very small crew who kicked ass and really came through for us. We couldn't be happier, really. The footage looks amazing, thanks to Jim Kunz and Brian Davis. Sandra Buckshot did the FX and Bill Corpse constructed the props. We also had several talented actors on board, including Jeff Dylan Graham, Adam Cardon, and Katie Royer. Chuck Norfolk and Courtney Sandifer flew in from Texas and completely rocked it. Victoria Cadwallader flew in fron New Mexico and helped us do continuity for a couple days, despite practically being on a death bed. Veronica Rodarte did hair/makeup. John McNamara did sound and we bonded over sprouting seeds. Amanda Lauren Duchow took our set photos (thank you!).  Holy crap. It was awesome.

Several producers came on board to make the film happen: Nick Nicholson, Frederick Rushford, Chuck Norfolk, Mike Merryman, Miguel Rodriguez, Michael Colburn, and Joe Lopez. We really can't thank you enough!
To top it all off, we shot in a real morgue. The most beautiful green morgue we could have hoped for, which is located at Linda Vista Hospital. LV is being torn down this August. We are lucky ducks.

Jeff Dylan Graham as Paul.

Katie Royer as Jane Doe.

The most beautiful and high maintenance camera ever.

Shannon Lark as Vivienne.

Adam Cardon and I.

Directly after shooting, we launched into editing mode. Lori was a machine. We currently have a rough cut of the film and we are SO excited to finish post and submit this to film festivals. To find out about the film, go here to the I AM MONSTER facebook page.

To top it all off, the day before we commenced with production for IAM, I went to an interview at the American Film Institute for the Directing Workshop for Women application I submitted on New Years. I had made it to the 2nd stage of judging, and I hadn't been that nervous in a long time! To be one of AFI's alumni would be a total honor. My fingers and toes are crossed.

I snapped this at the AFI campus. Beautiful!

Meanwhile, I've been writing interactive fiction, working on a feature length screenplay, and working with the Viscera Organization. Women in Horror Month 2013 rocked it this year with over 50 Ambassadors domestically and internationally who participated, filling out and following WiHM's seal approval guidelines, educating the public through events, PSA's, and online participation while professionally assisting women behind the lens, canvas, and pen in the horror genre. Wow.



For interview wrap up, we have Viscera's former Marketing Director Michele Izzy Galgana's interview with me for the Viscera Organization for Diabolique Magazine. The official in-print article (not interview) is available in Diabolique Magazine #13. I did an interview with Jed Bundy about my work as a filmmaker and the separation between the non-profit and what I do cinematically, as well as a fun little interview with popcorn horror for Women in Horror Month. Horrortalk also released an interview I did with Karin Crighton that featured dance parties, the organization, and how freakin' bad ass equality would be in the film industry.

I know it's backwards. It's the bizarro version.;)

Día de los Muertos is one of my favorite days of the year.

Could it get better than this?

It's a rite of passage for souls, for a new season, for new beginnings. It's the step through a doorway to a new life. Growing up along the border of New Mexico and Mexico, it was even a celebration in the ultra-conservative town I lived in. Christian fundamentalists who refused to celebrate Halloween would at least look away when Mexicans celebrated a holiday that was infused within their culture. It reminds me of my undying affection for "Santa Sangre" by Alejando Jodorowsky-a movie that changed the way I look at cinema.

When I was fourteen I jumped into my first mosh pit on Day of the Dead, and today, at age 30, I have some very exciting news.

I knew this day would come: when all the tiny and large pieces would come together like a giant, fantastic jigsaw puzzle. All the years of hard work have culminated into this moment.

Day of the Dead truly rules.


I have been picked up by representation by ADA Management. I've done some searching for the right manager in the past but no one had truly stepped up to the plate and really understood the whole package of my multi-faceted career.

My dead grandma rocked it tonight. She approves of ADA.

Well, ADA "gets it": truly understanding my love for genre and larger-then-life characters, but not wanting to get pigeon holed as a b-movie actress. I'm an artist on many levels and enjoy all sides of production, coupled with an innate desire to help others with non-profit work. This is where ADA-Joanna Shirley and Andrea Albin, has stepped in and blown me away with not only their understanding of what I'm doing with my career, but also becoming a huge part of achieving my goals.  And when I benefit, those who work with me benefit. Those I assist with the Viscera Organization benefit. It's a family of like-minded colleagues who have a common goal. It's a cyclical love fest.


Sweet.

Photo by David Goodfellow.

Besides my fantastical ride so far with ADA (I'll be posting the exciting news here about our journey together),  I have been very busy working to get my past and current work properly presented and available for all you crazy kids on the internet. Thankfully, I have an assistant who is kicking my ass and supporting me where I need it.

These images will soon be viewable on the Shannon Lark facebook, flickr, instagram, google plus, tumblr, and even on twitter. I even started a photo series called Shannon Lark's Moxie-detail my adventures through visuals, with many images I take personally.

GO here to see the Shannon Lark Moxie collection on flickr.


The Viscera Organization has been doing absolutely splendid. It's simply booming, and I'm racing to keep up: applying for grants and ensuring the staff are supported. We've had some truly amazing additions, as well as moved some staff around. The Board of Directors (Heidi Honeycutt, Stacy Pippi Hammon, and myself) has brought on Lori Bowen, the Director of Operations,  as a new board member. It was a big decision for us, since Pippi, Heidi, and I made up a trio that was strong due to our differences and strengths. Having Lori come on the Board of Directors was a wonderful decision that is already playing out in assisting the organization.

Michele "Izzy" Galgana and Miguel Rodriguez are newbies who have just thrown their passion into their positions. Gina Marie Soller has become the WiHM Marketing Director, Ashlee Blackwell has taken on WiHM Sponsorships and Admin Coordinating. Lia Scott Price has jumped on board with MOHA (Mistresses of Horror Alliance) to be the MOHA Sponsorship Director. Also, several Tour Coordinators have jumped on board to work with James Morgart, our Director of Media and Distribution, including Jenna Pittman, Dara Jade Moats, and Dana Keller.

It's all about putting the pieces together and making them fit. It's my favorite thing to do--make it GO.


The Etheria Film Festival premiere landed in Boston in September, thanks to the efforts of Chris Hallock and Mike Snoonian, as well as Michele Izzy Galgana, Kayley Viteo, and Maude Michaud. The sci-fi/fantasy film festival took place at the Somerville Theatre and was packed. It was so successful, that we have taken Etheria on for next year, as well as on our international tour. Now Etheria films are available to screen in venues all over the world, just like the Viscera films.  Be on the lookout for these films to get paired together at different events.   The 2013 Etheria Submission phase starts December 1st. My, how time flies!


On October 1st, we announced our 2013 submission phase for the Viscera Film Festival, releasing a bad ass poster featuring the artwork of Joshua Hoffine and designed by Irene Langholm. Filmmakers are already submitting and we believe this will be our biggest year yet in terms of submissions, grantors, public interest, sponsors, and participating filmmakers.

Unbelievably beautiful poster.

The Viscera Organization's editor, Katie Carman, has created wonderful clips that show off the filmmakers at the 2012 Viscera Film Festival at the Egyptian Theatre. We are doing a "Filmmaker Spotlight" that highlights each filmmaker individually. You can check out the Viscera Film Festival youtube page to see who is being spotlighted now.




Women in Horror Recognition Month (WiHM) is doing a-mazing, with a supporting staff to assist Hannah Forman with seal requests, marketing, and assisting WiHM ambassadors to bring their projects to full potential. February sneaks up fast after the holidays, so we are striving to have WiHM 2013 to be the most organized and widespread year so far. All events/content are for philanthropic purposes only-all money must go to charity. We are working hard at ensuring that it's the underrepresented female genre artists who receive the promotion-that includes directors, producers, painters, special fx artists, photographers-those behind the camera and lens. That's what WiHM is all about and we aim to protect the integrity of the movement. It's not a pony-show.

All though pony shows are super fun to watch, we want the workhorses.

Photo and manipulation by Irene Langholm. Design by Matt Orsman.

You can read all about WiHM on the official website.




For an interview wrap-up, it's all Viscera. We have Wellywood Woman and a nice quote about Hoffine's work at Dread Central.



Oh! And a little treat for you all. A Día de los Muertos cupcake.  You're welcome.

Shortly after I wrote my last post, I packed my bags and my giant fortress of a bed and moved to sunny Los Angeles, CA. Having worked there for a good amount of time for the past 4 years, I decided to take the plunge and be with the beautiful people full time (yay!).

Since I landed,  I've hardly been in lovely Los Angeles. It's been a crazy ride and I've forged some beautiful friendships and business relations that have me passionately fueled for more.

SO. Let's get it on.

The day after Christmas in 2011 I jumped in my hot rod (okay, more like an early 90's beat up hot rod) and hit that same road I had traveled dozens of times, rolling into San Diego early the next am. After breakfast with family, we fought through LA traffic to meet Pippi, one of my partners in crime, and her kids to unload the uhaul. Done and done. I'm now officially an L.A.'er.

Moving to LA when I did was at the perfect time. After growing up hanging with meth heads in trailer parks, LA is easy-as-pie. There is no culture shock and my motivations for my career contain all beautiful sides of the coin: to make fantastic movies that intensely affect people, to help other filmmakers, and to make money. I want all of it. I want the most delicious cake ever. And I'm going to have it.

That being said,  I jumped immediately into auditions and nailed the first one I did, which ended up being for a company that acts as a gateway for several TV shows. They quickly sent me to another audition for a low-grade television show. After sitting 3.5 hours in traffic, then in a line with people who nervously shifted their weight, we were processed and ordered around by cold, mechanical people in a giant warehouse. Soon after we were marched into a room wherein the next 3 hours was like an actors' mexican prison. They separated the boys and girls and we were forced to improvise on the spot with several different characters. Most were sweating with deer-in-the-headlight expressions and would quickly be interrupted by the referee who would point at someone else and say "GO".

The shooting of the segment was even worse. They figuratively threw the actors to the wolves, letting us know that we had to debate via improvising.  Even though I despise debate, I won. There was no prize.  And the pay? $50.

Yup.


Having been to several illegitimate auditions, I wasn't surprised by the low pay, time input, and general exploitation of hopeful actors wanting to be accepted into the hollywood system. If you don't have proper representation or a body of work behind you, you are a bottom feeder.  Like one of those mud bugs that are really good with garlic sauce. You rip off their heads and suck the innards out before tossing it over your shoulder and reaching for another one.

Outta sight, outta mind.


Leaving the bad experience of low-grade TV to dissolve from my mind like a bad crawfish experience, I headed over to Malibu to shoot my final scenes for "Disciples", a film by Joe Hollow and shot by Wolfgang Meyer. We did principal shooting in Florida in late 2011 and spent Thanksgiving together where I narrowly avoided being thrown in the pool, hit up a bar called "Griffs" to experience the locals (best place ever), and worked with some amazing actors who influenced me greatly when I was finding my place in the world: Lianne Quigley, Brinke Stevens, Debra Lamb, Tony Todd, Debbie Rochon, Bill Moseley, Barbara Magnolfi, and Angus Scrimm all took part in "Disciples" as well as so many gifted actors and crew who I'm honored to call friends. In Malibu, we got to hang out on the beach all day and explore the town in between scenes. So much fun.

Pretty birds!

I ran off to Penn State University for a Viscera screening and panel at the Carnegie Building. The audience was thrilled and blew me away with the questions and interest in the films. Preferred films change with audiences in different geographical areas. I dig that. Meanwhile, I met adorable doggies and a snuggable cat, got to know friends better, ate sushi, drank triple shot lattes, and enjoyed the blatant homo-eroticism that the Superbowl brings American audiences each year.

Carnegie Building at Penn State where the Viscera Screening took place. Huzzahh!!!

The 2012 final judging phase for the Viscera Film Festival also landed in our laps. The Staff and celebrity judges watched a total of 180 films by women. It was an intense experience and incredibly organized due to Viscera's Director of Programming, Heidi Honeycutt and her assistant Kayley Viteo. I worked with our grant writer and applied to several grants for the organization, making my head spin with the fine tooth comb that had to be applied to the budget and letters.

This happened. Photo by Jessi Tetzloff.

At the end of February, the Viscera Organization threw its own WiHM event for City of Hope. It was a bone marrow drive and sponsored by Fangoria Entertainment, Hypnotiq, Cella Art Gallery, FEARnet, The Homicidal Homemaker, Irene Langholm, Matt Orsman, and several local shops in the LA area. We screened Viscera films on the wall, hung female-driven art, played music, and put up our backdrop. City of Hope received over 40 marrow registrations which is rare for them. We were elated and also made the big announcement that the Viscera Film Festival would be held at the historical Egyptian Theatre on Hollywood Blvd for the 2012 carpet ceremony, a venue that is preserved by the American Cinematheque non-profit whom we crossed our fingers, toes, and hearts in hopes to work with.

Beautiful photo manipulation by Irene Langholm. Design by Matt Orsman.

Photographer Jessi Tetzloff came to Los Angeles and we terrorized the town for a few days and did some awesome photo shoots, including one on my washer, which I thought was broke until a friend came to visit and plugged it in for me. I'm retarded. It was a total chick moment.

I'm looking sad on laundry day. Photo by Jessi Tetzloff.

In March, the Viscera Organization shot commercials, which were directed by Nikki Wall and DP'd by Jim Kunz of Creatively Bankrupt, featuring shots inspired by Norwegian Artist Irene Langholm's work. Wall scheduled all the actors, props, costumes, and makeup and we utilized a green screen. You can check out the FB gallery here. The commercials are currently in post-production with Wall in charge and Enrique Ochoa doing visual FX.


The next day, I arrived in New Mexico because my grandmother passed away. She was a spitfire and relatively contrary her whole life and when she was ready to check out, she was out like a light. I completely respect that. What a roller coaster of a life! She certainly didn't like things to get boring. For her wake we headed up the show covered mountain and threw her ashes off a lookout point, wherein my niece threw ashes in my Mom's face by accident. Hi-larious. Afterwards we filled up my Mother's house with a black Irish family and partied all night: drinking margaritas, sharing stories of my grandma's antics, and doing Irish dancing. This is how a wake should be and I'm thrilled to be part of such an insane, obnoxious Irish family.

Landing and bridge where my grandmother took flight.

After the wake, I shot over to Hawaii and had fresh bananas, mangoes, coconuts, and the most mind-blowing hospitality. Beaches. Waterfalls. Hiking. Rainbows. Coffee. Snorkeling. Centipedes. Beautiful moments and Spooky Trees.


For a pretty little post-wrap, we have an interview with Inside Horror in real live video (wow!). An interview with Dana Keller at Cinemadame. I'm sure there was more and as they surface, I'll be posting them here.

One of my favorite things about working in film is all the wonderful people who come into my life. The past couple weeks have hit me like a ton of bricks (the good kind), and it wouldn't have been the same without all the awesome people whom I met or reunited with along the way.

For the past few weeks, I've been going back and forth to upper state New York for the filming of "CUT." The people I met on the set of the production made such an impact on me, especially my roommate Adriana Lambarri. She is a-mazing, and if you are a director/producer, you should hire her. Every time the directors yelled cut she was right there to make sure I didn't look like a complete doofus (which apparently I desperately need). She even took care of me when I had too much to drink at the local Irish pub one night. I swear the bartender was out to conquer and destroy, and that he did (at least he destroyed me).

Jenny Osborne, the beautiful makeup artist, took her free time off set to show me how to do my makeup. I had the absolute pleasure of working with incredibly talented actors Mark Hanson, Tom Lodewyck, Jesse Kozel, and Devanny Pinn. I did a particularly intense scene with Joe Hollow that I can't wait to see! Awesome, awesome people. Really there are too many to put here, and I'm really terrible with names.

Once I wrapped I had a day to recoup before racing off to El Paso, jumping in a car, and driving through the night/morning to Dallas, TX to get to the Texas Blood Bath 2. By the time I got out of the car, I was shaking and my eyes were burning. A bed was graciously offered up by friends.

On Sunday we rode the hotel shuttle to the Film Festival (seriously, the best way to attend a film festival is by hotel shuttle!) and my film "Lip Stick" screened. Every time I watch "Lip Stick" with a live audience I cover my face in horror. It reminds me of shooting one of my first films, "Marburg." It's a terrible film and features me vomiting throughout most of the movie, with a finale wherein I explode blood out of every orifice. I recall being on set with my head in the toilet for the second day in a row and wondering if "I was crazy." Watching "Lip Stick" with anyone other than myself or my Mother (she's a huge fan) reminds me of that feeling.

After the screening I ran upstairs to be part of the "Walking Distance" commentary. I was still completely out of it from the traveling (and warding off a cold with trusty kamboocha and sushi) but I think it came out all right. It was lovely to meet April Burill and see Jeff Dylan Graham, Marcus Koch, Mel and Melanie House, Domingo, Chris, Debbie Rochon, Reggie Bannister, and his wife GiGi again. Afterwards, I was able to catch up with great people and some other really great films. A copy of "Dead Hooker in a Trunk" by the Soska Sisters had been waiting patiently at home for me to watch it but I am soooo glad I was able to catch it at Blood Bath 2 for the first time. DHIAT is exceptionally well done, hilarious, and sets a great pace. I loved it and couldn't believe that it was over when it was over. It felt like only 5 minutes had passed! Way to go Jen and Sylvia!

"Lip Stick" won for Best Actor in a Short Film. AHHH! IT'S SO AWESOME!!! Thank you Texas Blood Bath 2! Thank you Andrew Rose and his wife for bringing all this together. Thank you for understanding what myself and Stacie Ponder were trying to achieve. Fuck yeah.



The past few weeks have been a fabulous time, and I got my sushi fix on many nights in a row with great friends and miso soup. What could be better?

While shooting CUT and running around the southwest, I was able to re-launch the Viscera Film Festival website. I'm once again about to bury my heard in 501(c)3 paperwork so I can get this bitch off the ground completely. Annette Slomka has joined the Viscera staff as Sponsorship Supervisor. She is phenomenal and has assisted us so much already. You rock, Annette!

We have extended our submission phase to coincide with Women in Horror Month. Soooo excited.


Also, check out the refined Viscera Film Festival Facebook and the new trailer, which features clips from the Viscera Films that are available on the DVD's. We will be announcing soon all about the venue, tickets, and attending Special Guests. Our goal is to make it more organized each year, and I really feel like we are achieving that goal everyday.


As for other news, a new "The Toy Box" trailer has been released here. However, it's incredibly brutal, so check your sensitization at the door.

It's fall now. The weather has officially changed in New Mexico to be a nice subtle chill from the blazing hot sun that pushes down on you all summer long. I've missed my scarves, my hoodies, and my leg warmers. In San Francisco I wore these all summer long. There was fog, and hills, walking for miles in heels, and strong Americano's with snapper sandwiches.

I miss SF but I did not have a pumpkin patch like I do here. I didn't even have a back yard, nor did I have the best dog to have ever existed.


October is obviously a special time. However, this October has blown me away with how creative the people are around me. It seems like everyone is making something. Maybe it's just Facebook's integrated social networking that makes it easier to find out about various projects. I've said before that I wished I could live on a film set but I don't feel that way any longer. It's wonderful to experience the work of others in between dashing madly to the next adventure. I like this. Life just seems to be getting more and more rich the older I get.

Have you guys seen Camera Obscura yet by the Daywalt Fear Factory? If not, head on over to daily motion now to get your fix and find out about the costume contest. I absolutely love how well done Camera Obscura is. The story just latched onto me and I can't stop watching it. Also, you can pick yourself up Fire Mass Magazine that features several wonderful artists, including the script of Mama's Baby (which I talk about in this post) before the movie is released. Yeah!!



A couple weeks ago, I flew out to Sac to the Sacramento Sci-Fi/Horror Show. It was so much fun and I was *fairly* well behaved. Everyone I met was so nice and open that by Sunday I was running around and dancing like an idiot. I stayed at a hotel with a lake (!!) and a 2 room workout center. I kicked that elliptical's ass.

Complete with a coy pond and Heron!

I screened the Viscera films with Stacie Ponder in tow on Saturday night and was graced with a responsive, fascinated audience. A group had to get up and leave while my film Lip Stick was playing (they had young ones in their group), but the majority sat through 3.5 hours of movies by women and my side comments in between the films. Afterwards I did a Q and A with the and a raffle. I tried to make them laugh. It worked!


Speaking of Ponder, she just released In Satan's Closet where I play a possessed woman and give fellatio to a cross. It's absolutely hilarious. Also, All Things Horror did a review of Ludlow, directed by Ponder all by herself! Amazing!


At the con, I got to meet up with Artist Mike Hampton who creates the Hot Zombie Chicks comics. Mike is a wonderful artist to support and his comics are refreshingly intellectual. That says alot for a man who can draw hot zombies all day.

I got some girl-time in with Ponder and Pippsta, which was nice. We went to Old Town Sacramento to a bar with beautiful finished wood. The bartender winked at me, which was slightly annoying. (I'm not one to get into suaveness. Give me a nerd who is tripping over his own feet any day.) However, they poured huge shots of tequila. I think I drank myself sober.

When I flew back home I ran into Lis and Brenda Fies at the Phoenix airport, as they were traveling home from the B Movie Celebration, where Lis received the Rising Director of the Year Award. It reminded me of what a small world this really is.


Yesterday I buried my head in 501(c)3 paperwork and ground out the application and all needed attachments for the Viscera Film Festival (Think of doing your taxes for 12 hours straight and you'll get the jist). I still have more to do, including amendments with the state, filing fees, and making it pretty, but the hardest part is over. YAY!


Later this month I fly out to NY to act in Joe Hollow's film, CUT. I just received word that the Shannon Lark Coffee Cup was reviewed on XOMBA. My website was recently launched, by Matt Orsman and Wirewaves, which is thrilling. Matt allowed me to obsess over this site since March, and I love it. I'm giving away a signed 4 x 6 autograph when you sign up for my newsletter. So head on over and sign up! All the cool kids are doing it.:)

The past couple weeks have been a whirlwind of insanity. It's no wonder I just woke up from a 21 hour-long nap to find my dog in TOTAL need of attention.

Seriously, he really is this awesome.

The Viscera Film Festival was...amazing. I don't think Heidi nor I could have wished for anything better the first time around and it was all because of the people who came and supported the event. The general attitude that the crowd brought with them and their absolute love and deep vested interest made the event what it was. We had some fantastic Special Guests (however I was very sad that Guinevere Turner was not able to show, she's got to be a personal hero of mine) and the filmmaker turnout was astonishing. The attendees were just...wow, so into it.


There were a million things that went wrong (ie, showing up 2 hours before the event to find out that the backdrop was delivered to the wrong address the day before). Heidi and I would just metaphorically slap our foreheads and shake it off before running to fix the problem at hand. The volunteers were amazing, and dealt with the stressful opening incredibly well. I was still in my pajamas when people were showing up, and it reminded me to actually get dressed before throwing a red carpet event.

People were jumping in left and right to help set everything up in time, specifically two significant others to a couple of the filmmakers. They saved the day, and I can't thank them enough. My wonderful friend (well, she's just about everyone's wonderful friend) Stacy "Pippsta" Hammon helped immensely. I truly can't give this woman enough "thank you's." Pippsta will be on the committee for next year, thankfully.

The awards by FX Artist Marcus Koch were beautiful, however many of them chipped during shipping (damn you, UPS). It was incredibly important to us that the filmmakers felt honored at this event. So many festivals are not truly honoring those whose content is screening. The fact that someone made those films with their imagination and their hands is mind blowing. Despite the issues, I think the majority of the filmmakers left feeling confident in what we were trying to provide for them. It's all about the love, baby.

We gave out awards for Best Direction (Director Liz Adams for "Side Effect"), Best Storyline (Producer Mary Katherine Sisco and Director Doug Mallette for "Beautiful as You Are") and Best Cinematography (Cinematographer Jessica Gallant for "Wretched"). The Audience Choice Award went out to Liz Adams once again for her short film "Side Effect."

One of my most favorite things of the Fest is hooking back up with filmmaker Stacie Ponder. We kind of lost each other for 6-8 months there. I grabbed her right before the film "Lip Stick" screened, which is a short film Stacie and I made last year after I had an epiphany about chronic masturbation. We entered the back of the theater and it seemed as though the Gods smiled upon us: two seats awaited us at the very back of theater, with no one occupying either one.

It was terrifying watching the film with an audience. I didn't know how people were going to react, and I think I put my hand over my mouth. But wow, people loved it! And if they didn't, they were too disgusted to even talk to me. It meant so much to me that the crowd really just understood what I was going for. Stacie and I have made some insane stuff, and I think it helped to reconfirm that we needed to keep working together and making awesome movies.

I thoroughly enjoy visiting and working in Houston. The heat is so wonderful and oppressive, everyone you meet is so nice and interesting, AND they have the best male-gay club in South Beach I've ever visited (totally topped San Francisco). I have now been there 3 times to work on various horror productions with Directors Mel House (Walking Distance), Dwayne Cathey (Play Dead), and now Michael Colburn.

The recent trip I made down to Texas was to shoot a movie called "The Toy Box." The intense film is about David Parker Ray, who was a serial killer living in New Mexico around the same area and time where I grew up.

He settled down in the town of Truth or Consequences (such a fitting name), where it is said that he murdered and sexually victimized over 60 women, dumping several bodies in the lake where I swam, fished, and camped by as a child.

Seriously, dead bodies show up in lakes all the time, and it only takes 20 minutes for maggots to infest every orifice of a dead body in warm water. Besides the fact that most lakes are now poisoned with pesticides and toxic spills, dead bodies float in them frequently.

Tip for all the kids: DON'T SWIM IN LAKES.


But this is the kicker about David Parker Ray: he created a $100,000 torture chamber he called "The Toy Box," where he took his victims and raped/tortured them with various objects. This came WAAAYYY before SAW and was so much more brutal. It would just be so easy to put a contraption on someone's face and watch them on the screen in another room like a little pussy. David Ray was a sadistic, sick motherfucker and enjoyed administering the torture himself, with a few of his accomplices assisting him (which included his daughter and his girlfriend).

I absolutely love seeing brutality in film. I enjoy the sheer terribleness of it. Give me Irreversible, give me Deliverance, and I LOVED Inside. I just want to experience the beauty of pain through cinema. Rape and torture is so incredibly important to show through storytelling. To me this is what aids in the prevention of acts such as this. If we refused to talk about AIDS or Cancer then it would be a widespread epidemic wiping out our species right now.

T & A is great and campy and all and has a place in cinema, but I want uncomfortable nudity, if there is any at all. I want terrible, terrible things to happen when I watch a movie. I understand how some feminists can be a bit put off by the victimization of women in horror. Depending on if you want camp or seriousness, there is a fine line for the way brutality is shown in film, and those who are not "hip" to the genre have a hard time seeing the intense social and gender issues that horror fundamentally represents. But in the real world, many women are victims. And many men are too. That's the point I want to make in my work.

I can't wait to see another male-on-male rape movie. THAT will be the day that I say "hallelujah!"


So, when The Toy Box's AD Jennifer Peebles and Director Michael Colburn contacted me, I jumped at the chance to be apart of this film. It delighted me to know that they were donating half of the profits from this film to charities (Victims Assistance Center and Parents of Murdered Children), and had done intense research and in depth interviews for character study. The set was exactly how I expected it to be: wonderful people getting together to work on this production that they believe so much in. Michael was incredibly supported by his crew and the cast was on top of it (just like ALL the Houston sets I've visited). I worked mostly with Scott Guthrie, who portrayed David's male accomplice and follower, Dennis Roy Yancy. He was incredibly fantastic to work with, and met my energy as it rose and plummeted into despair.
I've played a victim in several films but I've never experienced such a wonderful time being a victim before. The cast and crew truly believed in deeply portraying to the audience exactly what these horrible people did to others. I was absolutely thrilled to find out that I was going to be involved in the "tape-making scene." David Parker Ray made a recording of himself on an analog audio tape for his victims, which was played for them when they woke up. In the tape he is condescending, instilling a feeling of hopelessness into his victims from the get-go. A girl is screaming in the background, and Michael Colburn was so gracious to allow me to play that girl. I felt like it was fundamentally important to get into my character as possible: I kicked, I screamed, I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. I gave up. I fought and gave up into hopelessness over and over, again and again. I exhausted myself, gave myself rope burn, drooled on myself, spit on my co star, and bruised the back of my head.


It was wonderful to throw myself into it, and I'm still getting the feeling back in my left hand. I explained to Michael as he drove me back to the airport how wonderful it was to go through the emotions of terror, anger, sadness, hopelessness, and giving up again and again. Because someone can try to take everything away from you: they can beat you, torture you, rape you, and even kill you, but they can never, ever attain that one thing that is yours to keep: the soul. That is yours and no one else will ever beable to take that away from you. Ever.
I am so pleased and excited to have been apart of this production. The trip down to the Toy Box set simply reconfirmed within me that I'm on the right path. I just want to work. I don't care for how much or how little. I just want to portray characters that scream out to me.

It was particularly exciting to be shooting in a trailer. I love trailers and grew up in and out of them, with non-working swamp coolers and a feeling of poverty that overtakes your every cell as a child: making you acutely aware that all the other kids can afford lunchables their parents packed for them, when you forgot to make the limp sandwich for your lunch AGAIN. It's that depressing nostalgia I love about trailers. It makes me think of cocaine, alcoholism, meth in lightbulbs, running from cops in pants too big for me, and all the other oppressive details of my earlier years.

I will be posting more information regarding the film soon, and a t-shirt will be for sale with the image of myself and Scott Guthrie (above) on it. Please support this movie, and follow their progress. Thank you thank you thank you to all the cast and crew who made "The Toy Box" such a wonderful experience!

It's funny how life comes in stages: little steps that you much achieve to accomplish a goal that was once a thought, that originated from an experience, or a collection of experiences that make you who you are in this exact moment.

I love the Mafia. It's been 8 years and three versions of the website since I sat down and decided to take the monster on. I had so many ideas. I wanted it to not only be positive but reach its fullest potential. I juggled the site as I went to work, as I worked on my film career, and as I paid my rent. I dumped thousands of dollars into the beast, and have so fortunately received the assistance from so many talented artists, writers, and creators to make it what it was.


I have to admit over the past 8 years I've been guilty of pushing everything aside to take care of others when it wasn't needed. To pull them along, and try to make "things happen" for them. That's one of the basic ideas of the Mafia: to help other people and assist others in their quest. But in the end, I would have to realize that their quest wasn't mine. I had to sit down and grapple with lost relationships, with the idea that I couldn't MAKE THEM want what they said they wanted, but in reality they did not want it. And then I realized the burning question: what the hell do I want?


After my work with Fangoria in 2009 and an attempt at relaunching the Mafia with a substantial loan, I decided to step aside. Jamie Jenkins, our new editor,is such a wonderful, positive person who really "gets" where I'm going with the site. After milling it over again and again in my mind, I decided to ask her to be the CEO, and I would take an even larger step aside and simply be an Adviser. TCM's various pages (including the Slaughter Shop) will fall away, but the articles/interviews will simply improve. The site has been taken down for now, but we will be back later this year.


It was weird to ask Jamie to be the CEO: I felt like I was just giving my company away. However, TCM is still mine, and that burning question led me to the absolute confirmation that I just want to act. I want to direct, produce, and write. Over the past 8 years, I have done those things and worked on over 30 films, but it's while I'm juggling everything and everyone else around me.

It's time to put down the chain saw and conquer the world in a different way. And it makes me happy to pronounce that I'm just getting started.:)

After many long years of compiling stage and cinema work, my own website will be up shortly. The site is being constructed by my friend (and fabulous graphic designer) Matt Orsman.

A serious hats off to all the people who contributed their quotes regarding working with me for the site. I'm unbelievably excited to now have an online platform to demonstrate what the past 8 wonderful years have brought to me and those who were passionate and slightly demented enough to partake.